Athletics and Recreation



Ok, you guys are disturbing! My god, stop staring at me,
you freakin’ weirdo. Hello everybody,
my name is Markiplier, and welcome to Selfie Tennis. Now, I haven’t
played this one before, like the Space Pirate, but I’m directly
off of playing that, I am riding, like, a high from
playing these awesome virtual reality games,
and this is next on my list, so it features
what I can only imagine is a twist on
the game of tennis. Hello, you are freaky. Can you stop looking at me? And especially this one,
I saw this guy earlier. Or lady, I have no idea. They have clouds
covering their private bits, I don’t know who’s who. But anyway, so we got this,
we got a ball, oooh shit. I didn’t like that color anyway. And we got a tennis racket. It’s not exactly facing
the correct direction. Boink! Oh that is weird. Oh that feels weird. Ah! Oh? Oh I’m playing. Oh I’m playing with myself! 😉 I get it. Selfie Tennis, oh, aha ha ha. Shit. Sorry about the sissy throw. Fuuuck. Ok. Ok here we go. Fu- come on, I’m gonna smack
into my desk back there. Oh. (laughing) Euff! Oh. (crying) I’m so bad. Hup. Eh. Ok. That did something. Shit. Ah! Oh! Aww. It didn’t quite do it. Ooh, ooh, ah Fuck! I’m better than this,
I can do this. Shit. Deh. Ok, that’s good. Ah! Ooh! Oh, ooh. It’s weird ’cause
it like backs- ugh. It backs up in time
before I’ve hit it. But this is… I’m playing Tennis, look at me! I’m in the New York Tennis
Tournament of Tournament thing with Rob Schneider
and what’s-his-face. Kevin Federline. What is his name, god damn it! Ugh, ok… oh Aah! That’s so cool! Look at that,
that’s coming at me! Yeah! Oh, look at you. Look at you! Look at me! Look at me look at you! I’m playing Tennis God damn it. Son of a bitch. Hey, hooray,
I don’t know what did that. Oh he’s dead! Oh god, he is dead. Sir, sir? Oops. What is that? What the hell? Oh! What….? What? Wha- Oh! … oh! I’m a- i’m a unicorn? Is this a way of telling-
oh hey, how’s it going buddy? What the hell? Oh it’s so weird. Hi! I’m gonna do something to you. Oh he’s dead. Oh no, right in the grundle. Oh he’s so injured. Oh hey. Oh jeez. Excuse me? Can you- oh god. Can I pick him up? Can I… There we go, that works kind of. Little odd though. Ok. I wonder if you can play
multiplayer with this, like with actual other people. That would be super cool. I don’t know how. But I wonder if you could. Aah! Fuck your balls! Come on, give me something good. Give me something good
to play with myself. Give me something good. I can do this. Boink, yeah! Boink, yeah! I’ve got a rally going. Ooh, boink. Yes! I’ve got hand-eye coordination. Oh shit, not good. I mean I know I’m winning whenever I
play against me, but still. Fuck you! Oh… Oh that’s weird. Oh that is really weird. Ugh. Aah! Ok, we’re fine. Ok you just, yeah. You just go on your way ’cause I’ve got people
to deal with over here. Nope. (grunting) What does this look like? Let me spank my rump. Let me spank my delectable rump. Die already! Just fall down! Fall! Just go to hell! There we go. Uh oh. Good bye! Oh you stayed on. That’s not as cool. Gone, gone, woops. Gone- oh. Aah. There we go. Done. (grunting) There we go. Got him, uh oh. Wait, no. Well that hardly seems fair
’cause now there’s a bunch of dead bodies on the ground. Why did you repopulate
the stadium when- oh what is that? Can I hit that? (grunting) Oh it’s flying away. Oh it’s been… Oh well when did it
get impossible to hit? Ok, let’s give this
another serious try without killing the entire
neighborhood here. ‘Cause I- shit. Ok this is gonna be the one. Oh, what the fuck? I had that. EH, YAH, YAASS. Yaes! Yes! Yes! Yea- aahhh! Fuck you! Is that gonna be the one? That’s gonna be the one. Right over into my palm. Right into my clutches. This is so much fun I’m having. Uh Oh. I got it. Oh look at me. Look at me being
all classy and shit. Playing tennis like a boss. Like a Boser. Fuck you! I’m gonna get the high score,
it’s gonna happen. (hits hand on ceiling) Aah fuck! My hand! Ow! Ow, I forgot! Awwww! Let’s try that again
with less stupid. (replay of him hitting his hand) AHH- Ok, the heart ball. It’s kind of a baseball,
but I’ll forgive it. There we go, we just keep
lobbing it to each other we should be fine. There we go, now I’m in it. There we go, yes. Yes, new record, yes! Yes, slaay Markimoo,
slay at the Tennis. I’m gonna quit YouTube and become a
professional Tenniser. That’s what
they’re called, right? Tennissseurs? From the great
state of Tennessee? Uhh, boink! God damn it, oh god. Don’t jump, don’t jump. I kept wanting to jump. (replay of him hitting his hand like a idiot) AH- I really wanted to jump for it. Keep your eye on the ball. Keep the “Veevay” on the ball. Keep it on the ball. We got it, ball’s on. Oh fuck you, you got in my way,
interference. There we go, I got you. Oh. Whoa, jeesums. That counts. Is this sad yet? I’m playing Tennis with myself
in the virtual world. I’m not even playing it
in the real world. Damn it, I swung that good. What the-? Fuck you. What the fuck you! There we go. Just short hops. AUGH! There we go. Uh oh, too much. Don’t jump. Get out of here! Get out! Thank you, get out! Good bye. What happens if I hit those? * twinkling noise* Ooh. Something happened. Ok. Whoa! I did not know we
were high above the earth. That’s really cool actually. I’m actually having
a lot of fun. It’s oddly relaxing
considering I just played the Brookhaven Experiment. Ta-dah! Yes, yes! Fuck! Again, with the right at the- fuck it.
Oh! look at my shame. I wanna look at my shame. I’m so- god I tried
to grab it, god. Oh fuck. I’m so beautiful. I’m so beautiful! Ooh doink. Yes, yes, yaasss! Uh-oh, oh, AH! Coming close to
a boundary there. We’re ok. Everything’s fine even though it went dark
for a little bit there. Come here you. There we go. That’ll go over. Yes. Oh damn it. Uh oh, oh no. Get up, thank you. Oh boy. (Weird orgasm sound) One away from the record. (grunting) We’re ok, not fooling this time. God damn it, fuck you. I got this. Oh! Oh what the hell. Ok this is gonna be the one. Watch this. Boink! Oh so perfectly, I know. It’s the best. I have clever things to say, but I’m just pacing myself becuase I’m trying- you better get out of
the way selfie stick. Get it. Fuck, oh god damn it. EUGHAAAAH, Get out of here,
get out of here. Boink, ok here we go,
this is the one. I know I’ve said that before,
but I was wrong again. Apparently not. Oh shit. (Sound of him hitting his hand AGAIN) Not again, why! Ok, I’m done, I’m done. Ow, that one hurt. Alright. Ok. Ow. It was just I… I just wanted to
get it really badly. I keep forgetting. Oh my god. Oh wow. There’s a huge scrape on this. So anyway, that’s enough
Selfie Tennis for now, that is really fun. It’s really immersive,
the physics are a little wonky ’cause if it twitches
out of place for just a second it messes you up,
but that’s ok. So, thank you everybody
so much for watching. I got a lot more
VR stuff for you guys to see in the very near future, but thank you everybody
so much for watching. Let me know how you think of
this game in the comments below, and if you wanna see more
VR games in the future. And as always I will see you
in the next video. Buh-bye! (Outtro music)

Reader Comments

  1. as someone who's been playing tennis for roughly ten years, mark is actually really good at serves and lobs… im surprised, to say the least…

    but in all seriousness, this is such a cool video! i wish i could buy this to see how closely the mechanics compare to real tennis!

  2. Markiplier you know that I live in Tennessee and Kingsport if you want to come over to my town then Shore

  3. I'm going back and watching these VR games again. I love to watch Mark play VR because he gets totally lost in what he is playing and it's always good for laughs. 😄

  4. I'm watching this next to my sleeping friend. I hope she doesn't wake up and think what I'm watching is something it isn't XD

  5. 6:47 and here we see the majestic Beastiplier hit his hand just watch his reaction!
    OH… WAIT he reacts with his mating call! This is truly amazing!

  6. The sounds Mark makes during this video are… questionable? Seriously though, just the audio of this sounds like "something else", if you know what I mean.

  7. I was watching this in the backround while reading cause' I love Markimoo and his voice is nice for backeound noise, but, about a couple minutes in I had to switch back over because of the peculiar noises he was making. Made my day. (:

  8. I enjoy you playing tennis VR selfie game I want you to break your record playing by your self because it’s so funny I laugh so hard.

  9. This was really funny because it kept reminding me of a cat trying to bat at something and CONTINUOUSLY doing the counter-productive thing

  10. A bro you have some funny Vr job simulator I don't know if you have any horror games but plz put some videos on

  11. Why can't I find a single video of gameplay for this game? I was interested in maybe getting the game, but every video immediately devolves into people just acting like an idiot and not doing anything. I just spent a good five minutes watching Markiplier pretending to jerk off, spank his ass, and hit balls at immediately respawning NPC's. I guess I wouldn't mind as much if this was actually comedic in any way, but alas…

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