Athletics and Recreation

Geoffrey the Dumbass: Rand Paul’s Drag Race

Geoffrey the Dumbass: Rand Paul’s Drag Race

This is a HeadGum Video. Oh, Will Haynes is starting a new podcast,
we have to figure out – We open on an ice cold Rand Paul, shivering to camera in a meat
locker. One by one, he brings out each contestant
in order of ethnicity, in a legit drag race, cars and all. The winner of this Shabbat Shalom gets to
take Rand Paul to the grand ball. Title card reads: Rand Paul’s Drag Race. Thoughts? Title card reads: Rand Paul’s Drag Race. I’m speechless. You’ve stumped me. I don’t know what to ask to even – Just – Even
begin to get to the bottom of what you just said. What’s cooler than being cool? Ice cold? – NASCAR. Nice car? NASCAR. Okay. Okay. Now what’s colder than ice? I don’t know – Rand Paul. Let me get this straight, you have a TV show
idea where, I guess it’s like a reality racing competition of sorts, hosted by politician
Rand Paul? Yeah, who’s ice cold. Chilled to the bone. If you win you get to take him to a dance? Yeah, a masquerade, of sorts. Okay. Look, I know the stakes are high – I didn’t
say that. The stakes are the opposite of high. You win, you get to go to a dance. You lose and nothing happens. The rewards aren’t even high. Well actually, uh, every candidate, lose or
win, gets a $40,000 stipend. This is insane. This is bizarre. Even for you. I’m thinkin’ we skip the first three seasons,
right? Straight to syndication? Uh, maybe we get an Emmy year five? Couldn’t hurt. In what way could an Emmy hurt? You’re like, “it couldn’t hurt.” Like it often does. You know what, you’re right. A celebrity guest would be awesome. I didn’t say that. That’s awesome, dude – I didn’t say any of
that. I said you’re whole idea doesn’t make sense. It’s not rooted in any logic. You’re not listening to what I’m saying. You’re just seeing my mouth move and then
you’re sort of intercepting those words before they get to you. Your brain is translating them into compliments
or something, And I do appreciate it – Got it. Is this some sort of RuPaul Drag Race parody,
by the way? RuPaul’s what now? RuPaul’s Drag Race? It’s what this whole idea is based off, I
assume. You only changed the first word. “Paul’s Drag Race” is identical. Look at your proposed art. It’s, it’s a poorly photoshopped version of
RuPaul’s Drag Race. You didn’t even get rid of Ru’s hair or her
hand. I mean you just put Rand Paul – it’s not the
same font. Honest to god, I have no idea what you’re
referring to. This is Rand Paul, alright? These two cars are drag racing and that’s
the grand ball! What’s wrong with you? Sorry? What’s wrong with you that you did this? Do you realize how jarring it is to get a
– just a quick glimpse into your mind? The fact that you live with this is frightening,
man. It’s, it’s pathetic. I, uh, I thought that if you liked the idea,
and it got picked up, maybe you would take me to the masquerade. I – and if that’s insane, call me crazy. You wanted me to take you to a dance. Yeah. So the idea was to create a show based on
another show where the winner takes Rand Paul to a dance in hopes that I would buy it, produce
it, enter the reality competition portion of it, win, and then go against the only rule
of the show which is that the winner has to take Rand Paul to a dance so that I can take
you. And you’re sorry if that sounds crazy. If it’s insane I can call you crazy? You’re crazy. What did you say earlier when you were like,
“he says everyone by ethnicity in order.” Yeah, from worst to best. Alright, yeah, that’s what I was worried about. Yeah, Moldavian, Lausanne, Jibuddhan, all
the way up to white.

Reader Comments

  1. 'how about this as a show, just carry on making jake and amir but replace jake with amir and replace amir with a random guy'
    That's, that's prefect

  2. I love that you can see the non focused character break/smile/laugh when the shot is on the other guy. It's hilarious.

  3. minor note, it would have been funnier if the last "thats awesome dude" was cut off by the end of the video.

  4. The frist watch is good and all, but with these as Well as j and a you Gotta get a second and third in there just to truly study the batshit insane and stupid stuff in absolutely everything being said

  5. I get why people like to say Geoffrey and his character are basically Amir but I think they are pretty different. Amir was constantly looking for Jakes acceptance even in statements he was almost asking a question but with Geoffrey he is so confident in his idiotic ideas its a completely different character imo (a character that I love haha)

  6. Wow didn't know about that channel! Just found out about it from the comments of the latest CH video.

  7. Damn Geoffrey really has it nice. I mean how chill would be be to hang with j&a and make vids and podcast for a living

  8. I was just waiting for amir to go ''holy shit that's a great idea'' and turn back into his old character lol

  9. I don't know what this but I didn't click it. If YouTube is now going to navigate me to videos I don't want to watch to give it views to prop up the people they want to prop up, I'm out. I can live without YouTube. For sure

  10. HAHAHA! I love the synergie! English isn't my first language, so it's episodes like this where I'm like… where the fuck are they talking about? But it's nice to confirm that they are indeed talking about absolute shit!

  11. I can't believe that I've started to use the phrase "that's awesome dude" un-ironically in my every day speech…

  12. When I read the title of the video I forgot that drag racing in cars was a thing so I was just picturing Rand Paul yelling at a bunch of dudes in drag racing against eachother

  13. it feels like to me that they're just borrowing a lot from Jake and Amir and converting it into this. i still enjoy it though

  14. "Moldovan, Laotian, Djiboutian, all the way up to white." Nothing more profound has ever been uttered. Good shit, Geoff.


    It's not even an insult anymore, he is literally wondering what is wrong with the lad.

  16. The bait and switch in this video is so on point I have seen it over a 100 times and I still think it’s the single best video ever. Reaction time and response time are perfect 👌 been with em since day 1 when I killed myself in a Starbucks

  17. I love this video 🙂 But just to say, Ru Paul isn't a "she", it's very important to recognise that doing drag doesn't make him trans, and since Ru has a history of being transphobic in regards to her show it definately doesn't feel good

  18. The weird portmanteaus like Rand Paul Drag Race or Fig Newton Gingrich definitely feel like Goeffreyisms

  19. So fucking funny every time. Whats colder than ice rand paul. Why is he so cold go inside turn on the heater.

  20. Well, this is a little awkward… (from April 2015)

  21. What kind of fucking meatball did HeadGum hire to type the captions? They wrote Laotian as Lusanne and Djiboutian as Jibuddhan.

  22. So HeadGum has basically taken the idea of Amir's old CollegeHumor character and based an entire channel on it? Nice, I guess!

  23. That video was crazy crazy good.
    Amazing job, guys!!
    You tapped in to the frustration I feel all the time when dealing with people who just throw out stuff which has no connection to logic or reality.
    You captured the obliviousness of so many people.

  24. So we're just glossing over the fact that Rand Paul is in a meat locker, shivering on camera, and then brings out contestants one by one? Does he step out from inside a meat locker and introduce them because they were waiting outside for him? Or worse, are all of them inside a meat locker until the camera starts rolling?? So many unanswered questions!!

  25. I love that they have to edit around the laughing. There are like zero clean takes. Can't blame them though as just about every word said is too absurd not to break, especially when you know it's coming.

  26. i like how the races from worst to best are………well someone not white i'm assuming, and then: "all the way up to white", but he's not white, but he's so confident, so it's as if he's saying his race is not…….the best race, but……..holy shit this video

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